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THE CITY

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Saturday, August 29, 2009

THE DIRTY DIRTY SOUTH EPISODE TEN





In episode eight I was recollecting my experiences with those whom I have come across in Atlanta. Because I worked in the world at one time of marketing and promotions. I was very good with coming up with all these fun and creative ways to catch peoples attention, and I used it to my advantage. Understand I am a great sales person, and I know how to capture the attention of other’s. So in doing this my parties as I have stated before were not your run of the mill parties.

RECOLLECTION THREE

My first party that I gave I had invited some people from my job. Why not? I didn’t want to see them perform, I wanted the money. There was a lady that worked at my job whom I will call “Freda” Freda sold adult toys, she called herself a consultant. And with this I thought that I would give her a party, this was actually my first “swinger party” which did not start off that way. But ended up that way, and little did I know that Freda was a huge player in the game of “free sex” I mean I knew she had to be pretty much uninhibited about her sexual freedom if she sold adult toys. What shyness can you bring to the table selling adult toys? I knew that she had a relationship with a man there at the company we had worked at. And funny, he had ventured to my party.

I had invited another young lady who sold lingerie, she never showed up. There also was my bartender who also was a masseuse. I wanted people to come to my parties and make money just like me. Why not?

Freda I had later found out was in an adulterous affair with one of the supervisors at the job. I will call him “Sam” Sam was married and very loose with himself but claimed that he loved his wife and had no intentions of leaving his wife. Sam also risking his job at the company could careless if he was caught up in sex with the employees or spending time with the employees outside of work. Which was against company policy for anyone who was a supervisor or higher up to have any relationships with anyone outside of work? Unless work related.

This was a masquerade party; it was around the time of Mardi gras in New Orleans. Freda had totally forgotten what she was there to do, she asked me what and how she should sell her product. I told her that was her business to figure and ingenious way to sell her goodies.

However Freda was now acting as if she was not there to make money, and I seen the side of her that was wide open with lust. I felt that she was there to handle business not participate at any party. But she took it upon herself to have fun and not make money. This is what I meant and seen so many times here. No, not all men and women placed sex over money. But most tended to get caught up with sex first, money and power last. Sex was at the top echelon of madness and acceptance. Not only was her former lover there, but there was also an ex employee there of the company, her ex-lover whom she still flirted with heavily, and then Sam.

Now Freda had totally forgot as I had stated that she was there to make money. Money first, fun last. But as people had begun to adjourn upstairs to the illicit fun. I was downstairs talking to those at the party that did not come and have sex, but just to fill the party out and see what was so different about mines. And trust everyone had a great time with the entertainment I provided. It was like being on “The Price Is Right” we had kiddy fun in an adult way.

Well as I was seeing some of my guest out of my house, Freda had made her way upstairs. And as I was talking to one of my best friends, Freda comes half way down the stairs saying that she needed to speak to me. So as I excused myself from my best friend I was speaking with. She had told me that behind the door that was closed Sam was waiting for me to come and watch. But I knew better, Sam wanted me to participate. And guess what? I did not want to participate and I did not want to have the image of Freda and Sam in my head. Nope, so I told Freda, “Let me go and say good-bye to my guest” This seemed to excite her. But far from me being excited. Again, if and when I did things of that nature it was away from people that I seen, spoke, or spent time with.

My best friend had gone upstairs and had asked me if I was going to come upstairs to see what was going on. And just as I have stated that I didn’t want to have that image in my head. I told him the same thing, and told him to knock himself out. And he told me that Freda was the wildest one doing many things with many men and women. Later she was invited by a couple that attended my party to come and give her and her man a show before he was shipped back out to Iraq. It was video taped, the threesome was. And to be honest with you and myself. I wouldn’t have placed her on that level. It was my best friend who had brought the couple she had later on went to their home that same week and performed sexually for the camera.

RECOLLECTION FOUR

I never been too much of a gambler. But when I have gone to Vegas I would always play the slot machines. That was about it, I did see the real and true gamblers play for sport, luck, pleasure and some were addicted.

And when players got on the crap table and rolled the dice and crapped out it was not a pretty sight. I give this example because I feel as if the men, some of them roll the dice with the women here. They go from woman to woman and roll the dice, and if you keep rolling those dice you eventually will win. This is the hope that the gamblers have. They will keep playing and playing until they win the big money. Well here in Atlanta the men keep gambling on the women. They go and throw their lines to as many women as they can. With some of them saying the same line, and some of them hitting on four to five different women. And a lot of them do it right in your face.

“Jerry” Was once a trainer that soon was promoted to a supervisor. From the moment I was hired at the company he hit on me all the time. And Jerry was very forward, he hid nothing back. He was a married young man, him being in his early-thirties. Maybe thirty-three or so and I was 39 at the time. Jerry expressed how he wanted to have sex with me. He always complimented me, always came by my desk and would heavily flirt with me and keep a straight face. He asked me if I had on panties, would I show him what “it” looked like. He told me that he loved my mouth and smile, legs, asked me did I have big nipples.

Jerry was always making sexual advances towards me. Why did I not report him you may ask? Because here in Georgia it does not look good to be terminated for sexual harassment. And it does go on your record, when I got tired and it was too much I would tell Jerry to back off. Or I would give him “the face” Jerry did this the whole time that I was employed at the company. There was no giving up. And we have had many conversations about why does he try so hard, why does he have to have me. And that I know he hits on a lot of the women here right in my face. We had conversations of his wife and him wanting children. “I figure if I keep asking eventually you will give in.” If someone asks me to leave their home, I will never come back. If someone asked me not to call them again. I will not. For me it is just that simple! Rejection is not something that I take hard from a man at all. It doesn’t bother me. However I am not the type of person that will be persistent and stalk anyone. Or even for that matter worry someone’s nerves.

Jerry felt as if this was the thing to do, that gambling. Throwing the dice all the time he would eventually hit the seven or eleven and not crap out. Jerry was an all around nice person to talk to. So a lot of the times when he came on to me, I just would ignore him majority of the time.

Jerry offered me rides home from work at times. And on the one time he first offered me a ride. There was a co-worker who as well asked for one. Stating that she didn’t live far from me, “Shelly” was from New York, Harlem USA. And she was a very aggressive and blunt young girl in her early twenties. She had the mouth of a sailor and was scared of no man or woman. I had told Shelly that Jerry wanted to take me home. And that I was glad that she was riding because I did not want Jerry to hit on me. She said, “Yeah he does hit on you real hard. And every other ”

Jerry asked if we all wanted to have drinks after work because we all had gotten off work very early. Jerry could careless of following that company policy. Which I have already spoke upon. Jerry had rolled up some marijuana, and took us to Applebee’s. I was slightly on edge because I already knew what Jerry was thinking. He was going to take Shelly home first and then take me home last. I was already a step ahead of him. As I asked Shelly of she wanted to step outside and take a smoke with me, she said okay. So as I was smoking my Dajuram Black, I stated. “I do not want Jerry to take me home first. I’m going to have him take me home first and then take you home last.” “No problem. I understand.” And we moved on.

Well I did exactly just that, I guided him to my home first. And as I said thank you and bid my ado. I realized I had messed up bad. For one, Jerry knew where I lived. And two, Jerry was going to come right back over here when he dropped Shelly off at home. And even before I could take my clothes off, Jerry had called me and told me that he was at my front door sitting in his car. Could he come in and talk to me. I knew that this was going to happen, and yes I invited him in. He sat down, complimented my home. And then I spoke up, telling Jerry that he was married and that I did not date or sleep with married men. He told me he understood, and he asked for a hug, and said he would leave. The hug went quickly into a kiss he had placed on me fast. And my lips parted and I got swept up. Pulled back, and told him he had to leave. Yes I was attracted to Jerry because Jerry was they epitome of man I would date had he been single. But he was married, and he and I worked at the same company.

Jerry’s hands were all over my body, and he made me feel all tingly inside. Pulse racing heart beating erratic. It was a sin and my lust for him had me weak. He had to go; I could not spiral into this decline. There was absolutely no future in this or with him. And after all of that, he still rolled those dice, he still tried me. And I would lie if I were to say it was easy because it was not. I was strongly attracted to Jerry.

Time had gone by, more than six months and Jerry was able to drop me off from work another time. He had not hit on me for awhile; I was not feeling so uptight about him bringing me home. And one reason was my then boyfriend was waiting for me at my home.

The third time Jerry brought me home; he asked me could he watch the game because it was on. And yes it was the NBA Play-offs. I am a basketball fan and the Detroit Pistons were in the NBA Eastern Conference Play-offs. My youngest daughter was home. And I knew there would be nothing going on. And no lines were crossed.

When I thought it was safe to come out of the water. Jerry ups and comes onto me when he came to a dinner party I had given at my home. He caught me off guard in my kitchen he walked up behind me, his private being hard and pressing against me. I quickly turned around and told him “no”

RECOLLECTION FIVE

There also seemed to be many times that I have had men want to have sex so bad I guess you could say. To the point of them trying to force themselves on me. Now for me this had to be something that was in the water. Because it seemed very odd and overwhelming that this has happened more than one time. This just couldn’t be me. Was I the only woman that was placed in this vulnerable situation? No I was not. Because I have spoken to women and young girls here in this city of Atlanta-Erotic City, and this seemed to be common. This was also common it seemed at Freak Nik, which is why the city had to shut it down and not have the event anymore.

I had met a young guy by the name of “Mark” We met on the train podium. I spoke to younger men if they presented themselves to me correctly and I feel maybe able to handle the whole situation in dealing with someone older.

Mark was very eager to take me out and have dinner. He asked if he and I could see each other that evening. I told him that I would let him know. Of course this was after we had exchanged numbers. Mark was being too aggressive in wanting to see me. So of course I said that we should just wait for the weekend. And that we could meet up where he wanted to have dinner at. He agreed to this at first. It was upon a Wednesday when Mark and I had met, he was very attractive to me and I was attracted to him and his style.

Mark also didn’t hesitate when first meeting I to ask me for a kiss and a hug….I was very taken by this. And this was not the first time I had met a man here in Atlanta and they wanted a hug and kiss. And really wanted to press their bodies up close against mine. Was it just here? Was that sexual energy rubbing off on everyone that moved here? Because these were not the people that were from Atlanta that I was meeting.

Mark was persistent in seeing me. So we were going to have dinner. He had a roommate and said that he needed to go to his apartment and take care of something. So I went over to his apartment, and then all of a sudden we were going nowhere. He was now tired, of course I did not drive and he had picked me up. So he said that he wanted to talk get to know me. He sat on the floor and asked me questions about myself and abra cadraba just like that! He was complimenting me and rubbing my legs. And in a flash! His hand was going up my pant leg and he was trying to get my pants off.

I had pushed Mark off of me, and then he came back and started hitting on me again. Then it turned into he just wanted kiss and just hold me. He was extremely antsy and fidgety. He would back up, “Okay, you are right. We are supposed to be talking only.” And then he got up and started again. This man did and did not understand that I did not want him all over me like that. That him throwing himself on me and trying to make me have sex with him was turning me off. And I could not show that I was scared. And the truth was, I was very scared. Because Mark was trying to pull off my clothes as he would place his weight upon me and take it.

That is my time……see you next week as I give you some more recollections of this Erotic City of Atlanta, episode ten.

Toy High
www.justtoywrittenexpressions.com
5/2009

Sunday, August 16, 2009

EPISODE EIGHT


EPISODE EIGHT



It seems as if me getting closer to my time hear in this erotic city of Atlanta I am seeing more and more, hearing more and more stories. I begin to place myself as a recluse because I have those traits you see. Because when it gets warmer, colder here in Atlanta she seems to be bringing the hungry nature out of people. The want and the need to desperately reach out to the flesh.

There will be some name changes for the privacy of this episode not to reveal their true identity.

Recollection One

“Carol” was born and raised here in Georgia. No children at the age of forty-eight, and is a serious bike rider. And I must say that Carol has the body of a young lady in her twenties. Navel pierced, tight legs, she can wear her stomach out and show those taut legs. She is a very jazzy lady and has a strong addiction for sex and men. Her sex life, though for a lot of women who are in their forties has increased. She has always been a sexual being, and she exudes sexuality in all she does. She would be considered what they now call cougars. But with her it is slightly different; her prey is not of the younger men. It is more due for the men just a few years her junior. A strong flirt with a love and drive that she has no shame in. She sniffs coke almost daily and especially before sex, she hangs out with bikers, but her work life consists of her being and looking very conservative. She is the type of women that will have sex with any woman’s man if she is benefiting.

Carol has sent me pics by text message of her in some pretty precarious situations. Her giving men felatio and we are nowhere near being close friends at all. I have invited Carol to one of the parties I had thrown. Well she actually was invited by a man that I was dating at the time. And this was a man whom said that he could not handle my sex drive and that I needed to be with a woman who had money and was as sexual as I was while he sits and watches the game downstairs in my home. And he could come and join in later. I was aghast, only because how does anyone have the gall to tell me what they are going to do? Not asking, just telling me. How can anyone tell anyone what they plan on doing? He wanted me to have sex with Carol; he called her without my knowledge. He sent her pics of me via text messaging without my knowledge. I have never had a man just offer me over to another woman.

The gentlemen I was dating I will name “Steven” was drawn to my sexually uninhibited nature and was so open to see and try things that he had not. But was this my job to share myself with a man and a woman? I think not, and Steven was one of the many men that I had met in my past that said they were adventurist. And he really had not done anything too far out of the ordinary. Of course since he had mentioned, or told me this my feelings had changed for him. I was not in love with him; however I had love for him. And what I thought was a vey immaculate man had now turned into “They others” Like all the other like minded men. And now my respect had dwindled.

Of course I did not go through with this. While I had distanced myself from Steven, I could never ever take him serious. While Carol was portraying this good girl image, she was far from it. She was interested in illicit sex, but group sex. And she had just left a relationship with a woman for the past two years. And she was more than ready to be with a man. She had revealed this to me, telling me type of man she liked. And that so happened to be my significant other “Drew”

Drew was the type of man she longed for. I had gone back to Drew after I was with Steven. Steven and I had dated for a very short period. And Drew and I had only separated because of some financial issues on his end. Drew had tons of pride, and did not want to be with me until he had a job. However, I did not end the relationship because he was not employed. I knew the type of man that Drew was. Very genuine and loving and such a woman’s man.

Knowing that Drew was with me, Carol asked me, and then said that she was attracted to him. Hmm…I have seen Carol out, we did not become close, but she was a tease and threw herself at men. This was embarrassing to me. And the usage of coke, I am not a judge and have no right to judge anyone for what they do because I am far from perfect. But we are in the south and the tolerance for having drugs on your person did provide a penalty. And that penalty was jail, fines, probation, rehabs, etc., so it was not feasible for me to be around her. And she did this the two of the three times we were in each others presence. And she offered me a sniff the first time. Carol let sex rule her so much that she was upset when she could not have it, and when the men she would give herself to did not pay. Carol use to be an exotic dancer for twelve years.

Carol always sends me porn texts all the time, the jokes and video you may get from others. And what was oxymoron; she would always send me prayers, uplifting scriptures of angels, Jesus and God. I was totally confused of who she was.

RECOLLECTION TWO

Why would I not think that people who were politicians, detectives, policeman, and medical doctors did not have lives outside of their career that they indulged in. Because they do, hobbies, sports and the like. However I never knew that I would meet policemen and politicians who were heavy swingers.

Politicians and anyone in law enforcement is not only supposed to be around any narcotics. But even being off duty they are suppose to report suspicious behavior and not be in the company of people who sell or do drugs of any sort. You would think, but not so. I will tell you about “Officer Ron” in a bit. Who was a police officer for Fulton County, Atlanta Police Department.

There are close to almost two hundred swinger organizations in Atlanta, and many private sectors that you were personally invited to. They were not ones to have a huge following. Small sector of elite people, these are the people that are truly picky of whom they have in their circle. And it is not that easy to get in.

Now, as I have stated in episode three and four about swingers. I have attended parties before and have been invited to so many it is ridiculous. I definitely know that at these parties there are lots of drugs sold and taken. And in this, policeman and politicians are fully aware. But the rule of thumb is, if I don’t see it then I have no knowledge of it. However, if this place is raided, then of course their career or job is at stake. My point is this, are you so caught up in the lust of the flesh where you would jeopardize your status, career, or job for just that one night? I guess so. Well, yes one would. I use to be in the entertainment industry, and one thing I couldn’t do was have sex with the men I worked with. I held an authorative position that I never thought that I could ever see or have. Being a VP was very important me. And I did not want to have a dirty reputation. The men would always come in speaking of their sexual conquest. And speak on the after after party. I never ever indulged in the after after parties. Why? Because I knew what went on there. And the one thing I did not want to see the people I worked with in the light. As far as I was concerned, men and women could hoar themselves. And I looked at it all the same way, men did not get a pass from me because society tended to give men a pass with running around having sex with a lot of women.

When you have the pass to get high, drink and have sex it is a huge concoction for some wild and crazy drama. What behooved me the most was that Ron had a girlfriend whom he had turned out just like pimp does a low self-esteem young woman or girl. A woman who was desperately seeking the attention of having a man in her life because she was needy. And so he told her that he was a swinger, and this was his lifestyle. I could tell when I met her that she was not very comfortable with it when she first started. But it did not matter to Ron, he knew he had her. Even said he loved her very much. If one says so, I guess I come from the school of old. Yes, I am open to a lot of things, and yes I was at time okay with sharing. But I could not see me being married and giving the okay that my husband and I have this type of lifestyle. Back then yes, now, no.

Ron plotted and plotted and now his girlfriend was where he wanted her to be. Open to the whole new world of having sex with other men and women to please her man. And yet, living this lifestyle where he said he was open to, he now wanted to have sex with me on the side and let her know about it so that he wouldn’t feel he was cheating on her. (??) Ron is a very aggressive man, and I would not have felt comfortable having sex with him and his girlfriend knew about it. And then I would have to look in her eyes and be in her company. It is different if we are all at the swinger party and indulge, because everyone is aware of why we are there. I know some of the things that I may reveal may seem oxymoron. But for my personal reasons, when I partook of those things, I didn’t want to develop or have a relationship with any persons sexually outside of that circle. The only exception to this rule was that if they had knowledge in regards to business or assisting me to taking my career to the next level then I was okay with exchanging business cards.

Ron tried me all of the time, and he did not hide this from his girlfriend, and it was hard for me to except his phone calls because he would seem to always take it to when was he going to see me. I wanted Ron’s phone number because he was a cop. And just in case…….

And no matter how many times I told Ron that I didn’t want to have sex with him. This did not stop him from calling me in the wee hours of the morning. The men who did have my number did not want to except that I was giving these parties only to make money and nothing more. I did not participate.

One must understand that in this city of eroticism most of the residents who were bombarded with sex on their minds did not want to assist you get to the next level unless it involved sex in some sort of way. I was very dismayed with this production of so-called brotherhood. Meaning that I thought we all were suppose to add and uplift in our making it to the top of our careers or business’ “I want to have sex with a woman first before I start a relationship with her.” Is what I was told by a gentlemen who I had given my number to. I was surprised, I know that we all are at times so attracted to another person that we may jump at the opportunity to have sex with them. But to be so abrupt in revealing this info to a person when you are trying to get to know them makes no sense to me at all. Sex was like going to a Mc Donald’s drive-thru and placing your order, it was just that easy.

I will say that my eyes were open to all of this madness, and that I got caught up for a spell. And the reason why I had started to give parties was because it was easy money and something that a lot of people were into. But as time went on, just like the entertainment business had worn me out with the lust of the flesh. Atlanta, well she was wearing me out with all the extreme sexual aggressiveness of the men and women there. When I met a man who said he hadn’t had sex in a long time, I did not believe them. Too hard for me to believe them. It was too easy to get!

See you at episode nine, when I get to more and more personal stories and interviews….

Toy High
www.justtoywrittenexpressions.com
5/2009

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

THE DIRTY DIRTY SOUTH


Please answer this for me….how can an individual who is an alcoholic be around another alcoholic and say, “You drink too much?” Is there any right to say so? To judge the other person so harshly? Well, as oxymoron as it sounds and is, I have been there and done that so much while living in Atlanta. A person who enjoys a healthy sex life, and enjoys the recreation come to a place and meet people that had the same outlook. But when is enough enough? And when is too much too much?

Well it is true, I was instantly turned off by so much sexual energy that exuded in the Erotic city if Atlanta that I no longer wanted to have a relationship with any man. It was too easy to have sex here, too easy.

In exchanging numbers with men at my job, whom I thought were harmless turned out to be something else later down the line. What had bamboozled me the most was not speaking on the phone at all, and out of the clear blue getting a text out of nowhere sometimes months later. “When are you going to let me go down on you?” What? I’m a little lost. We never ever had any conversation that spoke of getting with each other in that manner. Nor did we have, or at least I didn’t sense any sexual chemistry between us. And because I am, or let me say pretty perceptive if a man is attracted to me. But to all of a sudden get a text message asking me that blew me out of the water! And the text messages from various men began to blow up my phone on a regular and surprise me.

If I smiled, gave a compliment, which is something I do with all people. I am a charmer, and with that it means I will say, “Hey beautiful how are you?” Once I got to know the men and women at my job. We would hug each other and kiss each other on the cheek. Of course this was in a non-sexual way. But my actions were eventually taken to be something they were not.

And this towards the end of my tenor at the company made me become a recluse. Where I limited more and more speaking to certain people because they had my pegged wrong. How could one not know after all this time at my job that this was just who I was, but this was sexy, a turn on. Because I was so positive and inviting it took on the appeal sexual signs and that is not how I meant it t all. I have had many many people say to me, “Toy the person you are is what attracts so many to you.” And yes I do understand that. And if this were so true, then why was I still left with the feeling that I was only a sexual pawn? And not have those who wanted to befriend me (males) and work on having a great rapport with one another? Still behooves me to this day. And the factor that I had to continue to defend myself in saying that I did not want to have sex.

There is a man whom I will call “Peter” He was at that time the regional manager of the company. He was a Bible quoting, faith walking, married pastor. Spoke of the love he had for his wife. And that prayer was the answer and God will work it all out. And even though I didn’t walk the straight and narrow. I do believe in God and all of his promises. However, I am not one to teach or preach and not live my life as an example. In other words, I do not play with God at all. At first it was all innocent, “Hey baby how you doing?” “I’m fine and you?” “I’m blessed” went to giving me hugs, which was not what he was suppose to do, no physical contact at all. Which did not bother me at all, I am an affectionate person. And then it progressed. “Girl you will make me cheat on my wife.” And then he would quote a scripture afterwards. Because I worked the early shift, there was hardly t many people that came in that early. But his advances had become a regular thing. And he would then began to tell me that if I needed anything he would be there, if I understood where he was coming from. Yes I understood what he was saying. It wasn’t until about two to three weeks that I had gotten tired. Why did I not report him? I didn’t want to bring any shame to him, and I knew that I could handle him. He would lie back, and then at times come back on strongly.
I was later told that he had a young lady fired from the company because she threatened to tell on him. He did it right before she got a chance. I was also told that he had hit on a few women there, and was having an affair with the receptionist.

I do want to make a valid point here, I do know that there are people who cheat, and are very flirtatious. And that is everywhere you go in the world. I was speaking to a person that had wanted to go to New Orleans. He said that it seemed as if it was a sexy town. If that is how you would like to look at it. But New Orleans, well, that is an erotic city. So much in fact but we will talk about that city another time.

The “norm” before someone literally feels comfortable in asking you to have sex is usually when they feel your vibe. However in major cities in the United States sexual play maybe a little higher than other places. Now in small towns in the south and in states that have cities a small population, pregnancy is high. There is nothing more to do but have sex. However I am speaking more on the level of when there are so many people in a metropolitan city. And they are plagued with the sexual bug, so quick to want to get laid. If they can have it the same day or night, or even the next day, that’s even better.

When I first got to Atlanta I was excited about meeting new prospects. Start dating and enjoying life. I had put men on the back burner for a couple of months because I had so much on my plate and I was just disappointed with all the men that I had met and was meeting. None seemed to be on the same page that I was on. There would be a sexual attraction for me, but I would not have a sexual, mental, or a physical attraction. And for me when there is someone that is more into me than I am to him. I am even more turned off by that man. Unfortunately for me in some cases, I am turned off very quickly and by small things when it comes to the opposite sex. Some things can just really creep me out.

If you ever have gone to Vegas, or have even talked to anyone who has gone to Vegas. Most of them will tell you they had a great time. For those who drink, they will drink even more. And you don’t have to drink alcohol if that is not your forte. And then there is the night life, there is a club in every hotel. All types of music for all different taste. There are things for the families to do together, prostitution, rather you are into that or not. And there is plenty of gambling, and there are a lot of people that have gone and go to Vegas and they are not gamblers. My point to this is, you will get sucked up into something that Vegas offers. And one thing that the city offers is plenty of alcohol and sex.

This is what Atlanta was to me, there was plenty here being offered. Rather you decided t get deeply involved or not, it was there. However I can guarantee that someone has a close friend that has gotten into a sexual tryst here. Lost a mate here, or even participated in what goes on here. It is a real deep and psychological issue when so many people feel so comfortable with asking for sex and throwing themselves at you.

I met a man who was not only down-low and had a wife. But he had a girlfriend at the job that also was married. And he still flirted with other women when the girlfriend at work was not around. How many women can one have?

When I had first gotten here and was looking for a job, I had gone to a job fair. There was a man there that was asking me questions about the job fair. I couldn’t answer any questions. I was a new resident here as well. I could tell no need in lying here that “Marcus” was a troubled man and very well could have been running from some troubled past and trying to make a new life for himself here. A lot of people that had moved to Atlanta seemed to be running from something.

What impressed me was that Marcus had a Bible with him. This told me that he had really wanted to get his life on the right track. So we exchanged numbers. We set up a date to hang out with each other. And let me cut through the chase, this man was indeed a real nut case. In going to his house one late afternoon, we talked, he made lunch for me. Then it began, he told me that he hadn’t had sex in a long time because he was saving himself for the right woman. And he wanted to have sex with me. What made him think in the very brief tome that we had known each other I was the right woman for him? I at this point was truly celibate. And sticking to my guns, this almost resulted in a case of rape! Can you imagine? He begged and begged and begged until I had to literally scream at him. He had picked me up, and no buses were running to where I could get home. And I was not too familiar as to where my location was. It was still early, but late according to bus schedules. He promised he would take me home in the morning, I didn’t wait, and I got up, got on the bus and came home. Needless to say, I let him go. He would call and leave messages and ask me who was I with? Why would I not speak to him??? And who was I having sex with? Exhausting.

To be perfectly honest, this column has been enlightening for me. I have seen the things I have gone and been through in a different light. I also have seen as to what I thought money that was the root of all evil turn into sex being the highest commodity here. I noticed just as myself, sex was a drug to lot of these people here. When you are a drug user or an alcoholic, when the addiction has taken control. It does not matter what you do, or how you get your alcohol or drugs from just as long as you get it. This is why we will see drug addicts on the streets sharing pipes, sharing needles, and getting high anywhere. As the same with those who have let their consumption of alcohol consume them. There is no longer the preference of having the “top of the line” drug or alcohol anymore. Just as long as one can get it is what that person is looking for.

People get high, drink, eat, workout, have sex when they are sad, happy, angry, depressed and when nothing is wrong. This is now when you know that it is a vice that you have. Notice a smoker, one of the first things they will do when they get some bad news or going through it they will pick up a cigarette. Even if they just had one. Me myself and I, well I will write. It seems tapping those keys on a keyboard help me to resolve a lot of issues and something inside tales over and its as if I have released all the negative thoughts and energy. And that maybe, just maybe when someone reads my work they feel what I felt at that time. And that they can learn from the experience, knowledge, hope, and wisdom that I relinquish through my words. And as I hope by writing this weekly series that if one person feels what I have said gets it. That they may be able to see themselves. It may not be that they have an issue with sex; it may be that they have issues with other things in their life that are truly addicting.

As I have worked on episode seven, I found myself getting worn on recalling so many events that have happened frequently. As I recall certain stories with you, these are not stories that are spaced out over a period of time. A lot of these things were consecutive. And it wore me out to have to constantly meet and go through the same things over and over. To seemingly have the same conversations over and over. Exhausting.

That is my time. Stay tuned for episode eight, where I dig deeper.

Toy High
5/2009
www.justtoywrittenexpressions.com

THE DIRTY DIRTY SOUTH EPISODE 6 CONT FROM FIVE


I felt that Chris was very uncomfortable with the swinger’s lifestyle and really did not want to participate in it. He wanted no parts with ménage trios, watching or going. But he was still interested in hosting the parties with me. The last party, I had was the last party. I had gotten tired and extremely irate and irritable at how people acted. I did not like the calls that men made to me that wanted to have sex with me because I did not participate at my parties. From going to other parties I began to feel the sting of disgust, the weirdness of others. And even at the parties I had attended it seemed no did not mean no. I had to report two men that were harassing me. It once again got dark; it felt as if I had this huge blanket of guilt. And the people that were attending this were way off in centerfield.

I was now around people again who snorted, popped pills, drank and other hard drugs. This was one thing that had made me angry. It was also amazing how others looked at other people with such disdain and disgust. And I was literally in a huge sexual gossip pool. I could careless who had a problem with getting it up, who was weird, who only slept with women, who had mental issues, who was broke. I mean the list goes on and on. I felt like I was at my regular 9 to 5 job! I could careless about these people’s issues, likes, dislikes, and other silly sides of their persona. We were all coming here for another reason. Of course you had conversation, but this was out of the park for me. And was this not suppose to be a place where couples came and swapped? So why were there men and women that were jealous? Didn’t understand that either. And didn’t understand how men were forcing their lovers whom they lived with or married to go to such said events. Crazy.

It got to the point that I was not being heard. That the men that had my number wanted to have me as a side piece without their wife or lover knowing. Did this make sense? The reason for swinging was for both parties to have sex with others and be uninhibited and open minded about it. Then I had to still contend with the harassment from the men and women from my job. I learned my lesson for the third and final time. When getting involved with such matters it is so overwhelming for me. Because it opens up doors I know will be open, but in my brain I feel as if I am conducting myself in a proper manner. I should not incur such any form of disrespect. I was a lady and not a floozy, call girl, or some chick you could…. But that didn’t matter, I was not getting it. I was being hard headed, this was suppose to happen. I was not in my world of how it should be done. I was in the world of what can and should and would happen once you walk in the doors. And I could not make it be anything but that… So why was I continuously being surprised by the mayhem?

So I had ended it all, and still to this day I am asked to open up my mind and pull my business back up and do what I did back home. I always enjoy the creative process, the marketing, how I will promote. But I knew better, I knew that I would see and hear things that I didn’t want to see nor hear. It was like I was trying ti re-invent the wheel.


BI-SEXUAL WOMEN


Have I had any women come onto me before? Why yes I have, but coming to the erotic city of Atlanta it was a whole different level. I had only had one woman truly come onto me. And I was not at a lesbian bar or club.

As I was getting to know the people at the company I was approached more than a few times, flirted with, and also knew of women who were willing to put on a “show” for some of the men. They were willing to sleep together, and to also have a ménage trios with a man. And if this was your thing, one should not test or infringe upon another what they do unless the conversation is put out there. Or at least a strong vibe… one should never assume… you do know the rest.

There was a woman that worked with me, I will call her “Mickey” She clung to me, wanted to get to know me. She was always proposing that we go out and have fun, break and lunch together. That was fine, but her attitude would transpire when I didn’t break or take lunch with her. And I wondered why. I took my breaks by myself and with others. I had no particular “buddy” that I went to lunch and break with. There were of course some that I vibed with on a different level and enjoyed the way we gelled.

We of course exchanged numbers, and I noticed that her calls were coming to me when I didn’t go to work and she began to call me a lot in the morning. Then it happened, she made a sexual advance to me. Telling me that I should get with her and stop messing around with these men. And she was with a man, dating men, and having sex with men. There was a new guy in town, meaning that he was a new hire. I was turned off by the fact that a lot of the women had gone goo goo ga ga over this man. Dong just as the men would do at the company when “new meat” was hired. Because I was giving him a hard time with a task he was told to do. He seemed to be drawn to me. He came by my desk three times that day. And this seemed to irritate Mickey. She asked me did I think he was attractive. And why was I speaking to him, and the questions went on and on. I will speak on him later.

It was because of this new hire that women had gathered around him in droves. There was nothing that these women would not do to get the attention of this man.

I was also hit on by a woman there (both women were not attractive to me-though all people are beautiful) She flirted endlessly with me, threw herself at me. And always had compliments for me. I did not buy into anything that either of these women threw my way. I was not interested in sleeping with any woman there, and none of the men. Or so I thought…

Of course I was still appreciating the beauty of Atlanta. However all the women and men were quick to tell me that the ratio of women out numbered the men. The statistics started off 7 to 1, and then it went up. And so this is the reason why so many men felt that they had carte blanche to cheat and play as hard as they did. And the women it seemed (not all) were more than happy to oblige.

In episode two of Erotic Cities, I mentioned about dating or having affairs with anyone I worked with. And as mentioned in episode two, I said that I would come back to that subject. And so I am, and so I did. I broke my cardinal rule. I spoke about “Chris” The man that all the women went crazy for when he was hired.

When I saw Chris for the first time, I was outside having my fifteen minute break. I was at this point dismayed with the people that were employed at the company as well as the office politics. Are we not at times peeved and perturbed with the job we have? It is good to know that there are some people who love their job.

Chris was the epitome of a gorgeous man to me, I saw him as he walked up the stairs. I knew that he was there for an interview, it was obvious. I wanted to run up to him and say, “No!! Don’t do it!” But I kept my mouth shut, I mean I really wanted to tell this man he did not want to work here. When my break was close to over, so that I would not be late. Chris was at the receptionist desk checking in. He looked at me and spoke, smiled, and that smile took me for a grand loop. I am a pushover for lips and beautiful teeth and a Colgate smile. Chris had that, well dressed. And I love that in a man, I guess what woman really doesn’t.

Two days had come and gone, and here he was! Chris was now working here, and as I stated before. He was the crème de la crème for these starved ladies. I on the other had refused to jump all over him like a hawk zooming in for the kill. Let them have him. The first day Chris worked all the women were smiling, standing up to get a good look at him. And this made the men who felt that this was their terroritory jealous. Not has any man thus far since I had been employed there was so many calamities over a new hire.

My supervisor at that time was riding me and I had just gave him a little piece of Toy. Chris was given a silly assignment to take pictures of all the employees and they were going on some display case. This was another thing that the company was doing that was wasteful and made no sense. And as Chris was going around taking the employees pics, I didn’t want to. And made that very frank. He thought it was funny. I didn’t, and it was at this time that he wanted to keep coming back around to me to get me to take a picture.

Chris had given me his number, and he had mine. However we never called each other. I saw him just as I saw the rest of the men there, he was getting caught up with the flirting and charm of the women at the company. I shook my head, hoping that at least one person could come here and not get caught up in the sexual lust. But he did, he flirted and charmed so many, and made so many men jaded there that he was written up for sexual harassment. This is when Chris had finally came up to me and wanted to talk to me. The newness of being there had worn off on me. While the other women were still throwing there G-strings at him. I knew that Chris was heading towards a train wreck. Because he turned down two women at the company, one decided to report him. Saying that he had spoken some uncomfortable things to her. I knew that some of the men and women there were throwing themselves at each other. But to be honest, as sharp of a dresser, and apparently a man who made sure he smelled great could ever be interested in a woman who smelled of urine.

Chris had been there three months, the only thing we did was speak to each other. Until one day, I was leaving work and walking to the rest room. Chris’s desk was near the restrooms. He then stepped directly in front of me and asked me what did I do, did I drink, do drugs, and I was totally caught off guard. I had no idea of why he was asking me this out of the clear blue. I mean we hadn’t had two or thee words with each other because he was involved in all these different types of training. Chris told me that he had been watching me for the past two weeks. And that for the past two days he had wanted to come and speak with me. But I had been getting away.

I had not ever gotten involved with any of the men I had worked with since I have worked a job, This to me was a huge no no. I didn’t think that it was cool to sleep or even try to have a relationship with anyone I worked with. I seen too many and heard of too many horror stories. Plus there was a company policy that certain people that have position of higher authority can not fraternize with each other outside of the company. Unless it was company orientated.

Chris was at my townhouse on time, he had basically told me that he would be over to my home. And of course that night I had broke all rules. And it was from that moment then that Chris and I were way over our heads. He had to contend with the profuse flirting from other men, and I had to contend with the women flirting with him. Did I mention that I never dated a man I worked with? And that we fell in love, and that we spoke of marriage? That he was so perfect for me? And if you have been following the episodes I brought him into my seductive world.

Well that’s my time I must go. However I will bring you back to the many many episodes that I have encountered here and others as well. Tune in and feel the vibe and energy of a city that has gotten caught up in the flesh. Could I be speaking of you? Just a thought.

Toy High
www.justtoywrittenexpressions.com
5/2009

THE DIRTY DIRTY SOUTH


I never in my wildest dreams could understand a person that would be around those people who bring the worse out of themselves. If a person knows that they have a drinking problem and continue to be around those who drink and bring them down. But there are a lot of things in this lifetime that we will and have questioned other people’s actions. Just as I have given you this example, I question myself in why would I want to give swinger parties are attend them when I know that I have a weakness with it. And on the flip-side of that which is highly oxymoron. I can not stand to be around sexually aggressive men and women that will not let up on the pursuing and speaking of it all the time . And again as I state before, I do not enjoy the dark side that comes out in the sexual genre. (the sickening things…rape, molestation, beatings, etc., etc., and other things)

When I had attended “Johns” swinger party, I was now motivated that I too could be good as he was in making money. That I would put a huge and different entire twist to this “swingers game” Before I had gone back over to the dark side, knowing fully well in the recesses of my mind that I had gotten out of the entertainment business twice because it had consumed me like fire. I had to again go and prove that I could handle it.

A co-worker of mine has a business where she was a consultant selling adult toys. I had told her that I would host a party. She was eager to plan the party with me. However me being the person that I am, loving so gingerly entertaining and hosting small or large gatherings. I once a VP of Marketing & promotions for a record label and I was taught by a brilliant and astute man that showed me even more in genius ways to promote and market myself and my business. Of course was when I had started MP Entertainment. And when you get two creative minds together it is extremely explosive! So now that I had prior experience with my own ideas, my own business, and the music business I once was (so I thought) ready to concur the same thing that got under my skin. Why not? .

MY FIRST PARTY

The more I sat and thought about it, I didn’t want a house full of women just sitting there at the presentation being shown dildos or lubricants. I wanted to have a bang out time and leave an impression upon everyone. And I did. At first I was going to have male exotic performers, but decided against that because I didn’t want the bother and I was not going to pay. Male strippers have never been something I have or had been into. Then I decided to have female strippers, and I decided against that. A masquerade Mardi Gras party! My entire guest had to wear mask and black or you could not get in. And I decorated my home like the French Quarters. I made up all sorts of games that we would all play. And this required everyone to participate. Upstairs in my bedrooms I had fresh towels, liquid soap, mouth wash, and condoms set out on the counters. My place was lit up with red lights, and I later found out that there was at least 40% of my guest who were attending their first swinger’s party. It was indeed a blast! There was a masseuse on deck to give chair massages, a person selling your toys, and you had a fully stocked bar and all types of finger foods, deserts, hor derves, and great music.

I made $380 that night, which wasn’t bad. But I was in the hole. I had spent money on food alcohol, supplies to create and make my own decorations. Plus there were the party favors and the materials purchased to create the games.

I never went upstairs to see the action, I didn’t want to see any of my co-workers in that light and have that memory embedded in my brain every time I saw them. And I was asked to come watch and get involved…nope. If I wanted to get involve with such illicit fun, I knew where I could go. This was business. And as I stated before, I can be and just as eccentric with my thoughts and views of having a great time. I didn’t like to things like that with people who were in my circle. Why should I let anyone know how eccentric I am? Would or should any woman feel wonderful if a man just so may happens to speak to some co-workers, buddies, or anyone else about the rendezvous they had with you?

Three weeks had gone by, and I was thinking if the first Swinger party was a huge success, (meaning everyone called and spoke of how they had a nice time) then I should go ahead and have another one. This one was going to be called “Hollywood Swingers” all of my guest would have celebrity names, and I would make games different from the last one. And I would have everyone wear red and black. My bar (literally) was stocked; the music was coming through the surround sound. I chose only to serve finger food snacks. I had too much food left over from the last time.

I was dating a man that was from a very exotic island and had the sexiest accent I had ever heard. He was 6’4, and when we first spoke I thought he was from London, I was really trying to figure it out. However it was a British accent. Once I got to know him, I told him I had thrown a party before. And that this was going to be my hustle. Some time had gone by since the last party I had given. And when I met “Sean” we had been dating for about three weeks, close to four.

Sean was excited, he had never been in are around this type of crowd. And he wanted to experience the dark side. I had a female stripper for this party. Sean took me to the store helped me get everything for the party. Decorations, liquor, face cloths that I could dispose or wash again. He was so excited. I was excited for him. Of course, he was ready to see the indulging lust that people were so easy to get involved in.

The party had a different set of people there. I may have had one person there that was from the last party. This party was very nice, so I was feeling I was now getting in to the swing if you will. I was sucked up, back into the life of my “I can do this” mode. Please understand when anyone knows they have a problem. Some of us feel that we can be in control of the negative environment and not get caught up. Now with me, I am not a heavy drinker, never been a hard-core drug user. And a lot of drugs that people have tried, I have not tried. I’m not weak for any man that delivers great sex and I will get caught up in any abusive type behavior from anyone. It does not matter how wonderful a lover. And you also can not have sexual relations with any and all all of the time. For me it is having the right person than you can be with. Knowing that getting back in this business for the third time was not good for me. But who was there to tell me but me that I would not be able to handle it. I had the experience, I knew what to expect, I had been around it all before.

I had noticed that in giving these parties I had begin to stress myself out. I was so much more acting as if this was a club event. i.e. treating it as if I again in the “entertainment business” the creative décor, food, liquor, creative games my job, fliers, promotions by any means necessary. I had begun to make this a job. I was giving these parties the same weekend I got paid from my 9 to 5.

I was also beginning to think more and more so out of the box. I began to have more and more fantasies of what I wanted, it seemed I could not get enough sex from the lover I had. And if he was not available I was angry, pouting like a two year old. And then it began the decline to my addiction. I began to release my sexual aura to others, I flirted, I laughed, I was always coiffed, I became a “super siren” And I could not be without a man in my life to have sex with. I at this time preferred one lover who would be my steady, but it was not uncommon for me to go to someone else who could do me justice.

I was hunting, and now I had began to pull people to my side of the world, the sensual and seductive side of my world. It was also at this time that dating “Sean” was no longer working for me. I had begun to a certain extent placing him as my slave. (Meaning he was just a pawn) My sexual energy and attraction had worn off. However, I was always nice giving and very polite to Sean. So overwhelming in fact, he felt he could not be the type of man that I deserved. He cried, wow! So we decided to be friends. And now this led me to quickly find a suitor to fit my needs.

Now steps in my ex whom I kept calling and speaking to telling him how wonderful the parties I had been given had turned out. He came to the “Hollywood Swingers” party. And thought just as others did that there would be nude people walking around; people would be having sex when you walked in the front door. It was none of that. You were invited by laughs, talking, me hosting a game show, great music and wonderful hor derves. It was an adult kiddy party.

I will call him “Chris” Chris was always asked by his unfaithful brother to come and have fun with him and go to the strip clubs and swinger parties. But Chris had always refused; he was married at the time. Though he did admit to me he took on three lovers outside of his marriage. At this point and time, I had never really met any men that were faithful to their wives or fully committed to any woman.

The social networking that went on at my gatherings was absolutely amazing! And this was one of the things that I came to love and hate about Atlanta at the same time.

So now I had sucked Chris in my world, a world that was extremely sexually emotional for some. For me this was not the case. It was say and do as much as you can and push the envelope as far as you can. Chris had already experienced me as a lover; however he was leery of doing all the exotic things I liked. He was very hesitant. And would always say, “Oh my gosh! You are so wild and freaky. You want to do things I have never done before.” Chris was green, and he is seven years older than me. He had been married for sixteen years. And had no open-mindedness when it came to sex at all.

These were the men I loved to have in my cipher. I wanted to turn a man out anyway that I could. And I was getting more and more caught up as the days worn on it seemed. And with this addiction the Sexy Siren wanted to make sure she had suitors, loyal and faithful suitors that would give her her way. And Chris wanted to, and did, and was going to give me what I wanted.

I now had pulled him, he wanted to be partner, he ran errands just as Sean did, and he was more than happy to play the games and network. He was so curious in doing and seeing. But very scared, needless to say I had him watching and participating at other functions. Twice that we both went, he decided that he no longer wanted to do it. Sharing was not something he was able to do and then watch. But he could be unfaithful (in his marriage) go figure Chris and Sean were slightly insecure of who I was, this charismatic woman who always attracted people to her. And they both knew and experienced men watching and speaking to me at various times which they felt disrespected. And I agreed, but remember this is an erotic city. Not too much respect for any persons feelings when you have one goal and purpose in mind.

Even in my warped trend of thinking did I not understand why anyone would be open to experiencing sex and having it as much as possible. I was not in to pedophilia, bestiality, a pervert that watched people through windows; I was not into beating someone or being beat for that matter. I just wanted some adventure in my sexual experiences. And there were persons that were not into such, though Chris loved my ferocious appetite and the wonderful things I wanted to do. He was still conservative.

I have to give you episode six next week. Until then, keep an open mind. Stay strong in the right convictions. And don’t be so easy to get caught up.

Just Toy
5/2009
www.justtoywrittenexpressions.com